That's not my responsibility

I read a lot of what other teachers say about forgiveness, and this point of view really annoys me:

"The true spiritual key to finding forgiveness for another is in awakening to your need to be forgiven for being seduced into hating anyone."

This puts the blame for pain back onto the one who was abused. There are a lot of steps to take before someone can get to this kind of enlightenment. Jesus did. Buddha did. Many Saints did. But most of us don't (and even these enlightened beings went through years—lifetimes—of spiritual growth to get there).

It's completely unreasonable to expect anyone, especially a child, to go from being treated badly to taking responsibility for being seduced into anything.